Samuel L. Jackson reads “Go The Fuck To Sleep”
Bedtime will never be the same again.
always reblog because best crossover in history
Metal Gear Solid ~ Cosplay by Rick Boer
i know not a lot of people add comments to posts reblogging but just gotta say you know what makes this incredible? the weathering on the costume and the location. Without these it’d be a damn good cosplay. With those… holy fuck is this real life I can’t hit reblog fast enough.
When asked how it felt to be the smartest man alive Einstein’s reply was “I don’t know, you’ll have to ask Nikola Tesla.”
10 SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE DATING OR FRIENDS WITH A MANIPULATOR:
1. Playing Innocent
A manipulator does not take responsibility for hurting others and instead plays innocent, acting like he is the harmed party when confronted about his hurtful behavior. By playing innocent and casting himself as the victim, he tries to throw his partner off balance, making her feel unjustified or even guilty about challenging his behavior. She may even become sympathetic, feeling that his bad experiences hurt him, instead of seeing his manipulative behavior as an attempt to win at all costs.
2. Rationalizing Behavior
A manipulator will offer rationalizations that justify his behavior, reasons that come close enough to making sense that the partner being manipulated is easily put off guard. The rationalizations are not his true motives, merely a means of justifying his conduct so as to avoid having to have a realistic discussion about changing it.
3. Now You See It, Now You Don’t
Try to discuss an area of disagreement with a manipulator, and the manipulator may try to retain control by changing the topic or throwing in everything including the kitchen sink to distract his partner from the discussion topic.
A classic example of how a manipulator diverts attention from the topic at hand is to talk about how the behavior he’s committed, and the partner has identified as a problem, is something other people do to him. He turns the discussion from his wrongdoing to how he is so often wronged.
Another approach is for him to introduce extraneous factors rather than respond directly to comments or questions.
4. Playing Dumb
Rather than address criticism or requests to change behaviors, a manipulator will often play dumb. With the goal of maintaining power and control, he will ignore the requests and not listen to others’s suggestions.
5. Sharing Half-Truths
A manipulator is likely to hide information that is relevant or deny his behavior by sharing just enough of the truth as necessary to convince others of his honesty. Key aspects of a situation may not be disclosed by a manipulator seeking to maintain control.
6. Inducing Guilt
A manipulative person makes accusations when confronted about his own behavior. Some classics are to accuse the partner of not loving him enough, not doing enough for him, or not doing enough to help him. His inability to change is portrayed as his partner’s fault. Typically, a manipulator chooses an empathetic partner who is vulnerable to this tactic.
7. Jokes and Insults
A manipulator will try to shame or intimidate his partner by making insulting remarks. When confronted, the manipulator will often try to pass off his rude and insulting remarks as “jokes.” A careful and honest listener will realize that his jokes are not funny and have serious, unfriendly overtones.
8. Blaming Others
A manipulator avoids responsibility for his own conduct by blaming others for causing it.
9. Minimizing the Significance of Behavior
Expect a manipulator to accuse his partner of making too big a deal out of his behavior. The partner will be accused of exaggerating the behavior itself or its significance. In other words, the manipulator contends “it’s not me who has the problem.”
10: Bullying the Victim
At the first sign his partner is trying to hold him accountable for his behavior, a manipulator may begin to turn the tables by bullying the partner. He may accuse the partner of wrongdoing on other occasions or of always treating him badly. By bullying the partner, he expects her to back off and let him maintain his controlling position.
***”Manipulation is a learned behavior — no one is born with it. It’s very much a survival strategy learned from early childhood and therefore changing the behavior is near impossible. Your time is better invested in developing strategies to protect yourselves, because you can never change a manipulator’s actions.”
In other words, dump the jerk and then look into how you attracted him in the first place. “Women who attract manipulators tend to lack self-worth and assertiveness, and they tend to be people pleasers. They trust to the point of ignorance and therefore do not realize that they are being manipulated until they have been in emotional turmoil for some time. It can often be years before they see the situation for what it really is.”
But once you do recognize it, you can put a stop to it. “First, take responsibility and own up to being a victim and a target. And most importantly, get out of the relationship and become who you really are; not something someone else wants you to be.”
This is mine and Ronnie’s relationship to a fucking T, except throw in some nice systematic alienation from my friends and family and some even nicer body image control.
GUYS AT WORK WE WERE DOING A GLASS PAINTING PROJECT AND MY DESIGN WAS THIS
THATS GALLIFREYAN FOR “FUCK BITCHES, GET MONEY.”
PLOT TWIST 2: IT’S GONNA BE ON DISPLAY IN MY CITY’S ART GALLERY
this is my most reblogged text post
god bless america
I hope this the last remaining photos of our presidents
Is no one going to talk about Ronald McDonald fighting in Clinton’s background.
A 50- something year old white woman arrived at her seat on a crowded flight and immediately didn’t want the seat. The seat was next to a black man. Disgusted, the woman immediately summoned the flight attendant and demanded a new seat. The woman said “I cannot sit here next to this black man.” The fight attendant said “Let me see if I can find another seat.” After checking, the flight attendant r…eturned and stated “Ma’am, there are no more seats in economy, but I will check with the captain and see if there is something in first class.” About 10 minutes went by and the flight attendant returned and stated “The captain has confirmed that there are no more seats in economy, but there is one in first class. It is our company policy to never move a person from economy to first class, but being that it would be some sort of scandal to force a person to sit next to an UNPLEASANT person, the captain agreed to make the switch to first class.” Before the woman could say anything, the attendant gestured to the black man and said, “Therefore sir, if you would so kindly retrieve your personal items, we would like to move you to the comfort of first class as the captain doesn’t want you to sit next to an unpleasant person.” Passengers in the seats nearby began to applause while some gave a standing ovation.
YOU WANT TO BE METAL?
I’LL SHOW YOU FUCKING METAL!
CLENCH YOUR BUTTCHEEKS BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS RIDICULOUS! WE’RE MAKING NO-BAKE CHEESECAKE!
GO HARNESS YOURSELF A WILD MOOSE AND RIDE IT TO THE FUCKING STORE, FEEDING ORPHANS AND STRAY DOGS ALONG THE WAY, BECAUSE YOU NEED TO GET YOUR BEAUTIFUL ASS SOME INGREDIENTS!
CARTWHEEL DOWN THE AISLES IN SEARCH FOR 20 GRAHAM CRACKERS, POWDERED SUGAR, BUTTER, CREAM CHEESE, AND SOME WHIPPED CREAM!
EITHER MAKE YOUR OWN SHIT OR BUY IT IN THE FUCKING TUB, BECAUSE THAT CANNED BULLSHIT AIN’T GUNNA SLIDE HERE!
ASK POLITELY TO BORROW YOUR LOCAL THUNDER GOD’S HAMMER, BECAUSE YOU NEED TO SMASH THE SHIT OUT OF THOSE GRAHAM CRACKERS! THROW THEIR SOBBING REMAINS INTO A BOWL.
STAB THE BAG OF POWDERED SUGAR UNTIL YOU HAVE EXACTLY ¼ A CUP TO SPLASH OVER YOUR GRAHAM CRACKER PIECES. DON’T GO EASY ON THAT MOTHERFUCKER! IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE BAG OF SUGAR THAT KILLED YOUR PARENTS AND ULTIMATELY DOOMED YOU TO A LIFE OF VIGILANTE CRIME-FIGHTING!
STICK ¼ A CUP OF BUTTER INTO THE MICROWAVE OR OVEN AND MELT THAT PIECE OF SHIT! USE YOUR BARE HANDS TO MIX IT TOGETHER WITH THE SUGAR AND GRAHAM CRACKERS UNTIL YOU CAN FEEL YOUR STEAMPUNK HEART CHIRP WITH GLEE!
PRESS THAT SHIT INTO THE SIDES AND BOTTOM OF A PIE PAN AND FUCKING HELL YOU GLORIOUS ASSHOLE, YOU JUST MADE A PIE CRUST!
I HOPE YOU’VE BEEN PRACTICING YOUR SIREN CALLS, BECAUSE THIS SHIT’S ABOUT TO GET FRISKY!
FINISH TAMING YOUR RHINOCEROS BEETLE KICKBALL TEAM AND WHIP TOGETHER 8oz OF CREAM CHEESE, 8oz OF WHIP CREAM AND 1 CUP OF POWDERED SUGAR TOGETHER!
KEEP STIRRING THAT MOTHERFUCKER UNTIL IT’S SMOOTH AS PRINCESS BUBBLEGUM’S CUTE BEHIND, THEN SLATHER IT INTO THE CLASSY-ASS PIE CRUST YOU CREATED EARLIER.
SLAP SOME PIE FILLING, CHOPPED FRUIT OR SOME CHOCOLATE SHIT ON TOP, I DON’T FUCKING CARE! FUCK, MAYBE YOU WANT TO SLICE SOME STRAWBERRIES AND LINE THE FUCKING PIE CRUST WITH THEM!
CHRIST IT’S COOKING NOT GODDAMN NUCLEAR SCIENCE! FOLLOW YOUR HEART YOU BEAUTIFUL MOTHERFUCKER!
DROP-KICK THAT FUCKER INTO THE FRIDGE AND WAIT AN 1 AND ½ HOURS BEFORE SHOVELING IT INTO YOUR GODDAMN PIE-HOLE!
MOTHER OF GOD, YOU JUST MADE SOME FUCKING CHEESECAKE!